Living life Effortlessly, in Flow and Stress-free
What defines a good conversation? Someone asked.
After thinking for a while, I answered, ‘A good conversation is where I learn something new, but a great conversation is where it feels effortless. Where just the presence of another person makes you feel good’.
She replied, ‘But, at times you have to put effort into a conversation because that’s how the world is’.
‘I keep away from conversations that require putting an effort’, I said.
I follow the above rule of effortlessness being not only in conversations but in every aspect of my life. This brings an interesting observation. We feel putting an effort when we do something that is mediocre at best and we do so because we have been told to accept mediocrity.
‘Don’t try to reach too high, because you will fail.’
‘Don’t dream too big, your dreams will not be fulfilled and you will be sad.’
‘Don’t expect too much from your partner, your needs will not be fulfilled.’
Is that how life should be? Shouldn’t we live our best? But how to live to our best?
I have seen that the best in everything - relationships, friendships, conversations, come out when it feels effortless, seamless, and timeless.
I have been living in a state of effortless action for some time now. I sleep 4–5 hrs a day, not because I read in a book to do so, but that is all I need to sleep. At times I take up calls at 2/3 am, ‘work’ 7 days a week, but I never felt I am putting in an effort. I have no stress and accept what comes.
The effortless state is where you flow in whatever you do, let go past and future, become humble, and stress-free. Have no goals to achieve. Just be present. This is in contrast to Western cultures that teach us to control the environment and swim against the flow, which causes pressure, stress, tiredness, at the cost of achieving self-created goals.
So when I read about the concept of Wu Wei in Daoism, which means ‘doing nothing’, or effortless action, I felt I found the ‘theory behind the science’. According to this concept, during such a state one is at peace while engaged in any tasks and can carry that out with maximum skill and efficiency — exactly how I feel at most times.
In China’s Tang dynasty, many poets likened Wu Wei to the best aspects of being drunk. It wasn’t alcoholism they were promoting, but the decline in rigidity and anxiety that sometimes comes with being a little drunk, and which can help us to accomplish certain tasks [1].
“Doing nothing can sometimes be the most effective form of action.”
Many may think that being effortless (or doing nothing) means to be lazy. I completely disagree — being lazy is an effort. Studies have shown that often people after retirement get depressed because they have nothing to do. For example, In Japanese culture idea of retirement simply does not exist — they keep doing what they love for as long as their health allows. Again, something completely opposite to the new trends of 3–4 day work week and work-life balance.
I do not feel like a need for work-life balance when you do work that you absolutely love. In Japan, this is called the state of Ikigai [2]. Ikigai is where our passion, mission, vocation, and profession all match (see image below). Being in the state of Ikigai makes one feel effortless.
By being at Ikigai one achieves Wu Wei and able to do grand things in life, while being completey stress free.
I am not sure how and when Western cultures came to the idea of self-created goals, achievements, hard work, and efforts but I can say that such a model creates more unhappy people, even if they achieve all that they seek to achieve.
Its time that we redefine success from achieving some goals to being in a state of effortless action.
“The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.” -Helen Keller
I hope you enjoyed reading this article. Feel free to share and like.
References
[1] Wu Wei — Doing Nothing, CHAPTER 6.LEISURE: EASTERN PHILOSOPHY, https://www.theschooloflife.com/thebookoflife/wu-wei-doing-nothing/
[2] Ikigai: The Japanese secret to a long and happy life, https://www.amazon.com/Ikigai-Japanese-Secret-Long-Happy/dp/0143130722
